California - Day 3 - meh....

First thing, I got up and went for a short run around the business district that the hotel sits in. For a business district, it was very lovely! SLC's business districts are awfully dull, but San Diego (Vista, actually) is so nice!

Our intention was to go to Legoland immediately, but the siren's call of the ocean was just too much. We just had to go.
After the night before, the boys knew a bit about how to judge when the waves are going to get you all wet. Bub had forgotten everything that she learned the last time we went to the beach. She wouldn't listen to me, and that resulted in what you see below.

Then, the boys started playing with a cute kid from Austria. They had a great time just playing in the waves. While watching them have a good time, I realized that my kids were playing on the same beach that I played on when I was the same age! (It was the trip that we went on with Colleen, Shellie, Stacy, and Clint where Stacy got lost every ten minutes.) What an awesome realization that was for me. My mom was a bit younger then than I am now, but still - pretty cool!

We were warned prior to going to Legoland that the boys might be a bit too old. They were just on the verge. Some of the rides were definitely for littler kids, but some were awesome. Really, the coolest stuff are the sculptures! I only got pictures of the Star Wars stuff, but it was all fantastic.
Even though they were a bit too old, we still had a super fun time. (Next time, we'll go to Universal or Six Flags.)

California arrival - Day 2 (aka: The Great Fruit Cover-Up of 2017)

Knowing that it was going to be HOT, HOT, HOT, we intended to get out of Vegas early. Instead, we spent at least an hour trying to get coffee.
We like to use time saving devices in order to be more efficient, but are we - in fact - more efficient? Case in point: The moving "walk"way. We sat on it instead....

Mmmmmmmmmmmm........... coffee.
(I don't condone the consumption of caffeine by anyone - especially 10yr olds - but here we are, nonetheless...

All tourists to SoCal must stop at Baker, right? Especially on a day with super hot temps, right?
You can't see it below, but the monster thermometer shows the temperature at 109* at about 9:30am. Ridiculous! We used the potty, bought a bumper sticker (tourists!), and watched the clerk create fake snow - the only "snow" she has ever seen first hand....
Can you see our skinny little people at the base of the thermometer in front of the bushes? Someday they'll gain weight, right?

Then, the second moment of criminal activity...
We packed a lot of snacks: crackers, yogurt, veggies, fruit, etc. The fruit was actually in a little bin that sat between Bub and I.
We pulled up to the border check-in stations where they asked us if we had any fruit (to prevent unwanted bugs from entering the state and harming their crops).
Cop: Do you have any fruit in the car?
Bub: Nope!
Me: [looking incredulously at Bub]
Cop: OK! Have a great day!

We had oranges, apples, bananas, more apples, cuties, and some other kind of orange.... They were all sitting RIGHT THERE.
Bub after we drove away: Oh! I forgot!
The boys were so worried about getting captured and taken to the fruit prison that everyone ate at least two pieces of fruit right then and there.
Here's the evidence:

We finally arrived in San Diego. Blessed San Diego that I love so much.
And LANE SPLITTING MOTORCYCLES! What the hell??!!?!
Motorcycles just drive through the middle of cars, right on the dotted line, barely skimming past side mirrors. Terrifying!!
Not our favorite thing....

Once we got checked into the hotel, we changed immediately into our swimming suits and hit up the Legoland water park. (But first, we had a botany lesson from Meatball. Check out the different sizes of these leaves from the same stem on the tree.)

Legoland was Meatball's choice for the trip. He had been looking forward to this forEVER, and we had a blast in the water pack. It was chilly, but worth it.
Finally, we went back to the hotel, and Bub called it a day. However, the boys weren't ready to give up the ghost, yet.

They had never been to the Pacific ocean before, and it was calling us. Dark? Who cares! Chilly? No problem! We were going to the beach no matter what...
Since we didn't know where we were and it was dark, we had a hard time finding someplace suitable to park, but we finally figured it out.

California, bound! (Day 1)

We have been planning this vacation for months. I have thought and re-thought the route, the lodging, the food, the activities.... I created a spreadsheet, found Groupons, bought and redeemed vouchers, price matched, scrimped, and saved. On occasion, I've even entertained some input from those vacationing with me.
The plan: head south to San Diego, north up the coast, and home on I-80.
Keep in mind that we limit ourselves to 6-7 hours in the car together so that we don't kill one another. This trip was no different.

It all happened flawlessly! (Riiiiight...)

But first, we had to get the arts festival out of the way. Then, Father's Day. In planning, this all seemed like a fabulous idea. In actuality, it was exhausting. Not the best idea ever. I got about three hours of sleep before we left...

Anyway, we woke up at 4am on Day 1, and packed the car. We woke the boys at about 4:45 and got on the road around 5am.
Don't know about all y'all, but our kids do NOT go back to sleep. So, it was constant talking that would last for the next two weeks.

We headed out "the back way," and got to see this wonderful sunrise around Eagle Mountain. (Note: There are no eagles around Eagle Mountain. Hawks, yes. Eagles, no.)

We finally hit the freeway at Lehi. About ten minutes later, Bub was pulled over for speeding. Not the best start, but she got off with a warning, so whew!

The temperature climbed as we headed south. We saw the smoke from the Brian Head fire but not the fire itself.
There was a fire off the side of the freeway, but it was under control.

We finally made it to Vegas (yuck) and checked into the Luxor, but NOT before we (Bub) parked in the wrong place leaving the trunk open which spilled the boys' scooters all over the road when pulling away.... (Kind of funny, but I won't say that to her face.)
We chose the Luxor because that's what Meatball wanted. Peanut chose Excalibur on our last trip to Vegas, so Meatball got to pick this time.
"I hope that we'll get slanted windows!"
Success! We also got a slanted elevator! Bub was not excited.

Then, off to dinner. Since we had already paid for a voucher to a specific place, we we going there whether we wanted to or not. Once we found it (inside a mall), we really enjoyed it. Bub and I had Italian sausage sandwiches, Meatball a kraut dog, and Peanut a pizza dog. Oh, and a colossal pretzel (Meatball's hand added for reference).

Now, off to bed, please.....

The Screaming Place

So, when things are going particularly crappy, I take the dogs and walk a couple of blocks to the hills behind our house.
I let the dogs off of their leashes, and I start to climb the hill.

And, I have to stop a few times because it's steep, and I'm sometimes crying.
I get to the steepest part, and I stop because it's steep, and my calves are burning, and I need to catch my breath from the climbing and the crying.
All the while, the dogs are having a blast.

Finally, I get to the top.
I look around and catch my breath again. Then, I scream.
Or, I try to scream.

But, I can't.
I can't scream.
It's not because I haven't caught my breath.
It's not because I'm still crying (although, my throat is tight and my face is puffy and my eyes are swollen).
It's because I just can't scream.
I feel like I'm not allowed. That's appropriate for someone else to do. There's no reason for me to be throwing my little fit. I'm a failure. I am so lucky and shouldn't be feeling sorry for myself. In the words of the wonderful songstress, Emily Saliers, "there's not enough room in this world for my pain." Who do I think I am, anyway?
It's a real shit storm of brain gymnastics that happens at the top of the hill - all the while, I feel like my chest is about to cave in, and my fingernails are digging into the skin on my palms.

Then, I let out a preliminary cough-like thing. And another. And another. They each get progressively louder until - finally it erupts like an animal growl-scream. Not a piercing teen-aged girl thing, but an angry, guttural, forceful mess of a howl.
Christ. I can't even scream right.
So, I try it again. Maybe a third time. But, now I'm tired.
Just trying to get it to come out has exhausted me.

On a "lucky" day, like earlier this week, the wind has whipped up around me, and my "scream" is lost in the gusts. Nobody in the homes below knows that I've momentarily lost it.
Then, I sit down on a rock, and hold my head in my hands while I sob.

Then, I get up, try to breathe through my stuffy nose, and pick my way through the loose rocks as I make my way back down the hill.
I leash up the dogs as we reach the street, and I return home to make dinner.

treat stealer...

So, tonight sucked.

Yes - last night, I ate 1/4 bag of those little malted easter eggs (robin eggs). My spouse had set them out so that the boys could snack on them. Instead, I snacked on them. So, tonight the spouse was giving me a hard time about the missing candy. Jokingly, I blamed "a mouse - a really fat mouse." Then, one of the boys worried that we had mice, so I said "We're just joking. There is no mouse. I ate the candy."

My adorable child #1 said "Mom, you eat everything."
Adorable child #2 asked "Yeah. Why do you eat all of our treats?"

The funny thing is that I eat 2 fruits and 3 veggies every day. I limit carbs. I drink loads of water and no soda. I am the person who tries to keep high fructose corn syrup out of the house. I am the one who uses only whole wheat flour and doesn't make food from boxes (anymore). I am the one who is moving the family away from cow dairy. I make sure that we take our vitamins, and I am always the "bad guy" for enforcing limits on screen time.

Yes - I have a sweet tooth, and I occasionally binge on the candy.

8yr olds can be harsh. Spouses sometimes just sit there....

Boo-hoo. Waaaa-waaaa-waaaa.
Just feeling fat and unappreciated and sad and temporarily ruined.....
[Sigh. I'll suck it up and get over it soon.]

cherry-chocolate, please

Today, we are celebrating some great behavior from the boys in school for several days in a row.
It just seemed like an ice cream kind of night!
I stopped by the local greasy spoon to get everybody's favorite flavor. Four shakes for $18. (Holy hell - what a rip off!)

Peanut: Butterfinger
Meatball: Strawberry
Bub: Coffee-banana
Me: Caramel-cashew

Every time we get shakes, I'm reminded how going out for ice cream was a HUGE treat when I was growing up. We typically didn't have money to spend on these types of things, so it only happened about once every six months or so. Isn't that crazy?
Anyway, I can only remember getting a Bishop or Caramel-nut or Caramel-Marshmallow concoction, although I'm sure that I've tried so many more.

My mom, however, unfailingly ordered a Cherry-Chocolate shake. Always. No matter what.
How long do these silly simple memories stay with you? It's not like I sit around and think about this stuff; I never think about this until I get a shake of my own. Invariably, though, at that time I manage to think of her and how she savored every bite knowing that it would be 6-7 months before she could afford to buy herself and all of us another one....

the hammer, or the nail?

I just finished watching a movie where "El Condor Pasa (If I Could)" played over and over.
Not the whole song - just the first verse.
I'd rather be a sparrow than a snail
Yes I would, if I could, I surely would
I'd rather be a hammer than a nail
Yes I would, if I only could, I surely would

I didn't really notice the song because it fit into the movie just fine.
Afterwards, however, the song popped into my head, and I immediately thought "I would rather be the nail."

Huh?

The movie was about a woman who was beaten down by life, and she struggles through her personal demons to eventually become a happy, well-adjusted human.
So, good for her. The hammer smacked the crap out of her, but she eventually became the hammer and is a strong woman.
Or, something like that.

And, I totally get that. I usually agree with it.

Today, though, I think that it's the nail that's the most important part of the equation.
Yes - it gets hit by the hammer, but they both suffer an impact. (The nail more so than the hammer due to its size, but...)
The nail, though, is only hit a few times, and then it's done. The hammer moves on to the next nail and more impact. Time and again. Overall impact to the hammer is more...

The nail, on the other hand, holds everything together for what seems like forever. As a mom - and a middle child - I think it's not a bad gig. Right?